The holiday season is often presented as a sparkly, magical time. For some, it is. But for many people out there, the holidays can be difficult, bringing up a lot of painful issues.

Spending time with family can be wonderful, but it can also be really hard. As our first and primary attachment figures for many years of our lives, families trigger so many emotions in all of us. For many people, spending time with family brings up distressing feelings.

If you fall into any of these categories, it’s important to know that you aren’t alone:

Choosing not to spend the holidays with your family because it’s emotionally painful to be with them
Estranged from your family, either by your choice or theirs
Feeling sad rather than joyful because you’re grieving; a death, a relationship, a pregnancy loss
Worried that someone in your family will be using substances or have a mental health crisis that will create stress, concern and embarrassment for you or other people in your family
Dreading answering questions about what you’re doing for the holidays because you’re doing something non-traditional or spending them alone
Choosing not to spend the holidays with your family because they don’t accept a part(s) of your identity
Unable to spend the holidays with people you love because of distance or other obligations
Feeling lonely
Experiencing financial stress related to purchasing gifts or holiday travel
Dreading certain topics that you know will come up
Experiencing a lot of negative anticipation about seeing certain family members

Despite what commercials and social media might suggest, you aren’t the only one feeling this way. Just remember, the holidays are just another day in the year. We assign a lot of meaning to them for religious and cultural reasons, but they don’t need to be more significant than any other day on the calendar. Take care of yourselves, set boundaries, say “no” when something doesn’t feel right to you.

If you need extra support navigating family relationships, make an appointment with me today.